Reading books together is an excellent way for a couple to bond before the great day

Okay, so it says here that you may be worried that I will get fat and flabby and stay that way forever and ever, and that this is a completely legitimate concern.

Right.

And if you do worry, you should never ever tell me or even hint at it, even if that means lying through your teeth.

Does the book say that?

No, that's me telling you.

Okay then.

...

Just out of interest, what does the book say?

Oh. It says "It is difficult enough to stick to a rigid diet for two weeks. To help her stick to it for nine months you will need to provide encouragement and support." But you have to prod my conscience, not be my conscience. Apparently this involves 'quietly reminding' me when eating out with friends in a restaurant rather than making a public announcement.

So I should whisper that you have to order the salad rather than shouting You're Not Having The Alfredo AND The Garlic Bread Are You? No Wonder You've Turned Into Such A Porker?

Yes.

Got it.

Or, and it's just a thought I'm throwing out there, you could always just remember that I'm a grown adult capable of choosing my own meals, and mind your own damn business.

That was pretty much my plan.

Glad to hear it. What's for dinner?