Wednesday, September 05, 2007

Zoo: Grubbing in the dirt and picking lice off one another as always

Dear Mr Merrill,

Hi. I'm one of those feminists. You know, the ones you want to see naked. And whilst we're on that topic – yeah, good luck with that plan.

Anyway, you seem a little confused about a few things. That's okay. I realise that it can get confusing, this radical concept that women are people too. I understand that it's easier to assume that feminists don't like sex than to acknowledge that we just don't like sex with you. And plus, I hear that all that thinking is emasculating, or something, and we wouldn't want that.

So I've tried to make this simple for you.

We* don't disapprove of sexy women. We disapprove of anyone who think their girlfriend's cleavage is for public consumption. We disapprove of anyone who makes money from exploiting the insecurities of others. We disapprove of those who think that it's okay to encourage their girlfriends to mutilate their bodies and insert potentially lethal foreign bodies into their breasts. Wait, did I say disapprove? Because I meant despise.

That is a despicable thing to do, and I feel nauseated at the thought that it was a popular competition. There are that many men out there who think it's alright to try and get their girlfriends to deform their bodies so that they look more pornalicious? There are that many women out there who would accept this?

And we don't hate men. We do, however, hate you, you vile, revolting excuse for a human being.
Hope that clears things up.


*I am handily defining 'we' as encompassing 'the group of people who share my opinions on this topic', here. Don't be fooled by the disclaimer, though. There are a lot of us.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I wonder if you have had a chance to view 'RalphTV'? - A tv show related to Ralph magazine. They have in-depth interviews with strippers, race-car drivers etc and the hosts sit around a bar to introduce the segments. The show is conveniently aired directly after 'the Footy show' on Thursdays. You should try it out, it would be an experience.


07 September, 2007  

Post a Comment

<< Home