Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Parentheses and a poll

Today you response to external irritants will be sharply slowed down. To struggle with it is not only difficult, but also useless, so do not try to do it.

So true, my friends. So true. You know that feeling, when you have to run in a dream, that you are running through knee-high sludge? That’s how I feel today. So, yes. I shall not try to struggle with anything, except perhaps staying awake.

And hey, wow, an entry that begins with how tired I am can only get better, right? I hope so, anyway, because I’m boring myself here. So let’s move on. And talk about penises. 10 inch penises!

(Genuine conversation topic or transparent attempt to gain web traffic? You decide!)

I’m stealing this topic from a friend who said he couldn’t risk posting about it. I hope he’ll forgive me, and I think we’ve all learned an important lesson about not telling our mum we have a blog, yes?

So, anyway, he was telling me that apparently these days what women want in a man, as opposed to humour, attractiveness, intelligence or earning potential (the last of these is a post all its own, but I’ll move on for now), is a ten inch penis.

My first thought was that the woman who told him this was having him on, but never one to jump to untested conclusions, I have taken a scientific poll (which takes the form of asking a bunch of my friends, and some people who work in a call centre. Hey, if it’s good enough for women’s magazines, it’s good enough for me).

(I should point out that I didn’t, in fact, ring a call centre and ask them this question. But it’s a tempting thought. Next time I get a telemarketer on the phone I’ll do them a deal; I’ll answer stupid questions about which phone company I associate with the term “innocence” and they can tell me whether the size of a man’s genitalia is of importance to them.)

(No, really. “Innocence”. Mobile phone companies and innocence. Oh, it is to laugh)

I will post the results tomorrow, but this is a plea for any readers to add their own results. Anonymously is fine. By email or via comments is fine. If you’re male, I want to know how you think women rank the following, and if you’re female I want to know how you rank them. Yes, I realise this is a heterosexist and severely limited poll and misses the more important things in life, blah blah blah. That’s not the point today.

So, if we’re talking about someone you would date, with an eye to a long term relationship, how do you rank the following:
Good Sense of Humour
Earning Capacity
Ten Inch Penis



Blogger abacus said...

"Today you won't be upset by the bad news. You will rise and try to make everything, for the news would become good. And you will manage to do it."

Is the linked site an astrology one or a religious one?

happily, i am a non-believer. on both counts. but when one has a ten inch penis, nothing else really matters.

hey, it even gives tomorrow's reading: "Today you will show an ideal combination of the optimist with realist. A rather strange hybrid, but, undoubtedly, nice." i can sleep easy in my bed tonight. well, as easily as a ten inch penis might allow.

now who's sorry they started the whole ten inch penis thing?

25 July, 2006  
Blogger Ange said...

I meant to post my comment on this post: I am running a poll here. It's all very scientific.

26 July, 2006  

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